Haiku Review: Oldboy (2003)

Oldboy (2003) Director: Park Chan-wook Starring: Choi Min-sik, Yu Ji-tae, Kang Hye-jeong Rating: 5/5 Review: How the holy fuck Is this remake going to work? I don't understand. Alternatively: Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew Seriously. Spike Lee's doing an American version starring Josh Brolin and Elizabeth Olsen, and there's a certain plot twist that's so dark and disturbing it left me wondering how the hell Lee's going to pull...

Haiku Review: Masquerade (2012)

Sometimes there's a lot I want to say about a movie. And sometimes there's only about 17 syllables' worth. Thus: Haiku Review. Masquerade (Gwanghae, Wangyidoen namja) (2012) Director: Chang-min Choo Starring: Byung-hun Lee, Hyo-ju Han, Seung-yong Ryoo Rating: 2/5 Review: This movie sure has, for an historical epic, a lot of fart joke...

Jamie Bell is Getting Into the Spy/Cabbage Farmer Market with New AMC Period Drama

Jamie Bell AMC is doing its first period drama, and the pilot will star Jamie Bell as a Revolutionary War-era cabbage farmer. OK, the cabbage connection probably isn't all that relevant, but my eyes caught on the phrase "cabbage farmer" over at EW.com and I won't apologize for it. Via EW: The show is set in 1778 and tells the story of a New York cabbage farmer (Bell) who bands together with a group of childhood friends to form The Culper...

Oscarpalooza 2013: Bring the Pain

Every year before this one I've said I'm not going to come down with a case of Oscar fever, and then I do anyway. This year I said screw it. I'm excited. The Oscars give film nerds like myself an unparalleled opportunity for bitchery. To that end, here's who I predict will win, and who I want to win. Best Picture Will Win: Argo Want to Win: Beasts of the Southern Wild. I like Argo; it was a good, solid film. Of the crop this year it's probably in...

In Which the Online Availability of Short Films is SRS BSNS

There's a bit of a short film Oscar kerfluffle going on right now, and seeing as I only have a few days left that I can talk about the Oscars before I enter the post-awards season zone, I'm gonna talk about it. Because darnit, it pisses me off. A few weeks back Disney put Paperman, one of the five films up for the Oscar for Best Animated Short, up for free online. Seeing all the buzz that film was getting, the other nominees did the same. But then Shorts International, which organizes theatrical screenings of Oscar-animated shorts (I've been to...